yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
If i apologize for punching you in the liver repeatedly will you explain where the grass stains on my shoulders came from?
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
my mom just left...time to break out that water bottle of wine that I sewed into my teddy bear
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
For my birthday I want you to get me in bed with Donald Trump. That is all. You have 3 months
i went to the 24h massage place last night and brought down the price for a hand job from $50 to $12.75 and half the big mac left in my bag.
On Friday, can we drink like its Civil Wars times and the doctor's coming to saw off our gangreen infected legs?
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
Randomize
