And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
looking at my texts from you makes me want to throw up in my pants
You should make a checklist to ensure they are quality material. Here's mine: wearing shoes, not drunk, very hot, has teeth, speaks english. You never know
thought a girl was checking me out today. took me like 5 minutes to realize it was a mannequin
I banged a guy named Robbie last night and in the middle of sex he begged me to scream santos. I'm pretty sure I just screwed a dude with multiple personalities.
I'm gonna tell the medical examiner that your cause of death was over-arousal.
It's the kinda thing that makes you wanna buy a rainbow flag and fight republicans and kiss girls
You tried to lick the lightbulb and fell off of the chair onto my wife and gave her a concussion. Did i mention you were naked?
I was so drunk, he put me to bed and went down stairs to hang out with his friends. Apparently, I was curled up in the closet, spooning the dresser when he came back up.
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
Randomize
