Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.
dude I just realized something - girls return my clothes washed so in thought bringing girls home is like avoiding going to the laundramat
I told her that if she blew me I would give her the empty pizza box in the fridge.... Why did she agree?
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
Apparently getting drunk at a philanthropy event and tweeting about it is "frowned up"
She took one look at my hardon and said, "You have a dick built for anal."
That wasn't a compliment.
I'm giving you an age limit on the people you're allowed to hit on at steak n shake at 3 am. I can't see straight and I want a cheeseburger. You want dick. I'm sure we can't order at least one of those. But maybe.
have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
"What's your dick like homie" is not really an acceptable thing to say out loud
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
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