that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
Did Neil Armstrong say the moon was too far away! NO! He built himself a fucking rocketship is what he did!
i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
I just recorded courtney puking and set it as my ringtone.
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
My gynecologist just commented on how well my vagina was waxed
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
I just got my hands on some dry ice. How do you feel about coming home to a mystical wizard toilet?
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
There's nothing quite like having a little 8 year old boy hand me a Bible on campus while I'm on my way to the health center because of my recent slutty tendencies.
YOU TRIED TO SWIM IN HER FISHTANK. I don't think she's going to call you.
I might attempt to pee into a cup while driving. I'll let you know how it goes.
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
I swear to god if I have to repeat this to you one more mother fucking time I will flip fucking shit and acidic rain will pour down upon your mother fucking soul
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