So I'm at the Chevron by your house. I need a condom and a couch.
Together?
Preferably.
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
Its really not funny anymore. I need to stop shaving while i'm drunk
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
Well if all fails we can always become surrogate mothers. I hear that pays well.
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
So I think I might just embrace the awkwardness and say he fingerblasted her cause thats the greatest word in existence
Doing lines off a plate that says, "things go better with coke."
But I swear to god if I'm awkwardly there while you try to have sex with someone again I'm getting high with your dad
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
i looked at my texts in the morning and saw that i had a full conversation with myself via text thinking it was someone else. i rejected myself
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
