I swear if I see one more guy in a v-neck and fedora I'm going to punch someone in the balls. This is philly, you're not supposed to look like Ryan Cabrera
i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
What can I say? I like my food like I like my women, not entirely fucked by our contemporary world.
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
Are you wearing clothes?
Fuck no, who do you think I am
He doesn't deserve you. Your ass looks 8 times better than his face ever will. Wanna order pizza and watch porn?
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
woke up this morning to a baggy full of adderall and two redbulls..i'm gonna marry this guy one day
Upon further investigation my nipples are bruised and I have teeth marks all over.
My parents left me the house for the weekend...you know what that means?!
Harry Potter marathon and no pants.
Randomize
