We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
why wash my dick in the morning if you're not there to suck it?
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
You threw a shot glass at the bartender and still managed to convince him to let us drink more. You are my hero.
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
Omg you can't vacuum salsa that's just ridiculous
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
Randomize
