This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
Just got to costco. Where are you?
Liquor aisle, bring another cart.
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
i am about to cut my stepbrother's hair into a mohawk with the same clippers i use to trim my pubes. god is so on my side today.
Hooked up with my first aid and cpr teacher last night. She dressed as a lifeguard and brought me back to life. Beat that.
sometimes i think what itd be like to be a firework
That fucking fat Asian kid that NOBODY invited is stuck in the dryer again
I told him I was engaged, had 911 on speed dial and made him wear his seatbelt, then dropped his drunk ass off at his motel...probably not the night he was expecting.
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
My mother is even happier about me having a sugar daddy than I am
i can trust myself, just not when im drunk. and drinking is my favorite pastime
I am now "wine pairing" tums flavors with my strongbow, because apparently hard cider gives me heartburn.
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
Randomize
