'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
the table of underagers at this wedding were seated 10ft from the open bar. currently 30 open containers on the table for 5 people. dinner hasn't even been served yet.
You are in charge of making sure that her vagina explodes with joy tonight.
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
I just looked at a girl and was like what disease does she have? And then my mind caught up ohhh shes pregnant.
A horseman, i repeat, a man on a horse downtown just told me i was gorgeous and my friends were not. Not drunk enough.
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
Next time I will hook the Xbox before I get high I spent 30minuts thinking I was playing the Simpsons game when it was in reality a tv episode
i'm sitting in bed scratching my boobs and wearing a sparkly fedora and have no one to blame but myself
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
DID YOU OR DID YOU NOT, PEE IN MY FUCKING TRASHCAN?!
Randomize
