turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
i'm gonna start putting 34DD under other qualifications on my bartender applications and see if that helps
When she e-mailed me back asking for proof, complete with hospital intake records, I just told her it was a home-birth. I'm prepared to take the fail.
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
Woke up in a kilt. And it's not my kilt. Drinking was a success.
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
I just threw up over a bridge. I didn't even know there was a bridge in this town. Vodka is like a transportation device.
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
I'm gonna hire strippers dressed like the founding fathers.
Clearly the ONLY reason why you were voted employee of the month is because of your upside-down beer funneling skills.
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
Randomize
