i found a roscoes card in my pocket that says 'fuck me bare fo $15.20'. Wow
I just saw a hobo ride by on a unicycle. Good day.
The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
I cleared a drunken path to my bed for you. If you hit clothes you've gone too far.
Since when do you have sex with people you have feelings for?
Dude you don't understand. I genuinely felt his soul's penis in my soul's vagina.
My body is a temple...that happens to be able to get me free Patron shots at the bar
I usually don't buy birthday presents for my booty calls
But you'll make an exception
probably not
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
You know those twins i had a crush on in grade school? Just woke up between them. Best. Party. EVER.
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
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