I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
lesson #67 learned in college: a three day old margarita, is still a margarita.
im goin to the NYE party with a tuxedo painted on my body. i know a girl who does it. wanna join?
It's only 4 pm and I'm already way past my preferred quota of "could have died" moments
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
I don't know if I should be scared or excited that I can officially drink vodka on the rocks like it's 7up.
To be so small, the mini-horses are exceptionally aggressive. And fast. Very, very fast.
Abort! Abort! He almost bit off a finger!
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
You really could become the cat lady we've always dreamed of.
I'm working on a search warrant...can u pick up box of Chardonnay...I'll give u cash when u get here...
Yea... I love that ur a prosecutor and drink box wine
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
Opening my shipments of mascara and nipple pasties this morning like a boss bitch
Randomize
