somehow on my way home with matt, I ended up straddling steve on the sidewalk and polling the people walking by on whether or not we should have sex.
This is why you don't make out with cougars at a bar... I got a linkedin request from her, wtf?
Down at cameli's and some homeless dude just pulled out a taser. Awesome.
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
Maybe we should invest in one and when one of us wishes to be a hot mess in a wheel chair the other one will push the mess around to wherever it wants to go.
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize
