I just ran from Santa Claus in Kroger
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
Times like this, when you talk openly about Tinkerbell being your spirit animal, are times when I'm allowed to question your sexuality.
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
Just a heads up before you get home. Took the shelves out of the fridge so i could fit the beer ball and bucket of riot punch. Apparently i decided the stove was the best place to keep them. They got cooked when we pre heated to cook a bird we shot. This may be the final straw for our security deposit
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
How'd the date with the redheaded dentist go?
She didn't like my gingervitis joke
He can't just hit it and quit it and then eat your pop tarts on his way out.
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
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