What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
I don't think I can get bothered with getting laid tonight
She had a muffin-top while wearing a one piece bathing suit. Thats gotta break one of newton's laws or something
jungle juice + heels + stairs = broken arm
I wonder what my nutrition professor is going to think when I have to put 21 keystone lights, a bottle of merlot wine, and 5 rum and cokes and 4 shots of tequila on my dietary analysis
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
So this is what you do on your hungover days off put your balls into an egg carton?
I just want to let you know that when you try and lie about the "solid 10" you brought home last night, I've got a picture of her and about 10 reasons you should have left her at the bar starting with those martin scorsese eyebrows.
Will it make you feel better if we wear the title of dysfunctional fucking roommates? It requires monogamy unless we want to bang someone together.
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
They picked up the lamp, held it aloft, and proclaimed apropos of nothing “this is going right up my ass”. LOUDLY
This is going to be so stupid, but do you feel the calluses on my hands when I give you a handy?
Randomize
