Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
they just dont make restraining orders like they used to.
Don't bite the hand that gives you multiple orgasms
I'm covered in salsa and facewash. I think I'm doing something wrong over here.
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
Your tequila is gone. I suggest you bring more home before you go out for dinner. Money is taped to mailbox.
Typical Sunday afternoon purchase of condoms and a helium tank.
He told me the color of his piss. Worst. First date. Ever.
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
Summary of my night: made out with a complete stranger at a club dressed in the Geico gecko costume...
We need to stop going on dates to the strip club.
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
Just had someone from Hells Angels snort coke off my tits...so I'm pretty much done with life now. 💀
I just gave a fucking twenty minute blowiob.. I'm a GOOD girlfriend.
Randomize
