at church Sunday morning I dropped an M&M down my dress and it landed in my bra. I fished it out and ate it. A lot of people saw me.
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
we found her in my closet eating a clove of garlic.
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
She gets me. First thing she said this morning "I'll buy breakfast if you can tell me my name."
Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself
I have the perfect view of a sexy blonde in yoga pants stretching from the shoulder press machine. I'll be here all night. So glad I came high.
Ur here with me in spirit. Now run free. Run free
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
Also, my phone suggested the phrase “puke in the mailbox" how many times have I had the need to text that to people?
my throat is bruised, my back is scarred, my vagina feels like it's going to fall off.. you're like godzilla. you destroy everything.
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
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