32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
I want to have a prehistoric party. By that, I mean I want to dress up as a dinosaur and get drunk. That's all I want in life.
I woke up to a hotel manager knocking on my car ( window was down) and asking if I was ok
Her life is filled with shit luck. Its like mother nature is having her period and just taking it out on her specifically.
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
On another note; I'm three days away from being 1/12th of my way from not having sex for a year. I need to get laid.
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
We got stoned and took selfies with the most perfect lawn
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