All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
I wore pigtails while I was having sex with that 22 year old just to make him feel like a pedophile.
I woke up with a bagel in my mouth, still ate it. Free breakfast
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
No he can't come. I swear to gods he's "Why We Can't Have Nice Things" given physical form.
Honestly, the only reason I've been productive today was because I ended up organizing my apartment while searching for my vibratory charger.
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
Dude. That's like masturbating until the point that you're going to climax, then stopping, waiting for a few seconds and then starting all over. While that does lead to an altogether more powerful orgasm, it's still annoying as hell until you get there.
I was not expecting that analogy.
No one ever expects that analogy.
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
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