found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
Turn sideways at McDonald's = actual directions to a winery
Not only did a random toaster end up in my house last night, it's also full of skittles.
he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
he obviously didn't care that i was sleeping and dreaming about ellen degeneres knitting me a christmas sweater.
The maintenance guy at work just asked me out for a drink. For once, I proudly said that I was 20.
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
can we just pause for one second and address the fact that balls were out last night
I hope your face alive. Lemme know if you are breathing in the morning. If not. Whoever is reading this tell me when the funeral for this awesome mother fucker is and we will rage at that event. Kthanksbye
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
Also, apparently I'm only coherent when I'm drunk sexting. And then I'm grammatically perfect and impressively eloquent.
Randomize
