Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
What can I say, I'm a giver.
Smoking up the homeless at 3am does not make you a humanitarian.
IM A DRUNK BIRTHDAY CLEOPATRA MESS. CELEBRATE THAT BITCH
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
Remember that time i gave you head on MY birthday and you made me stop so you could watch the rhino part in 300
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
What was the point of renting a $600 trolley if no one even remembers going to the first bar?
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
He's on the porch naked. Help.
Randomize
