Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
I'm eating mac and cheese for dinner that way when I puke later it'll be festive halloween orange.
Your friends turned off our power in the basement and when we went to turn it back on I got sprayed in the face with a fire extinguisher. FYI.
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
Is it morally wrong to give today's hookup a Krispy Kreme from yesterday's hookup or is it just fat love?
So I had sex with a hook nosed, lisping masadonian last night.
Glad that degree in literature is paying off. Nice adjectives. Maybe set the bar a little higher though?
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
I am at a new level of appreciation for drunk-you, who threw up into her own sweatshirt pocket last night in the car. Brava.
You are the human incarnation of a drinking problem
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
There needs to be a greeting card for "I miss having sex and smoking weed with you."
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
Randomize
