based on who turned up here tonight the whole evening should just be called "mistakes i made when i was fat"
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
Do you how many people I've successfully loaded into a Mazda Miata? Six. Six people. How? Strategically.
You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
OMG HE JUST PUKED WITH THE DOOR OPEN WHILE DRIVING ON THE ROAD AND OMG WE NEED TO CHAT BUT NOT ATM CAUSE THERES PUKE ON MY PHONE
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
Fuck you come back. The old guy next to me is complementing me on my great choice of ring fingers,
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
I just sat on the floor of my shower for 20 minutes to punish myself for drunk me's decisions.
He goes from zero to fucking up in 2.4 drinks. Like the sportscar of bad decision making.
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
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