Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
Call me at 7:30 and make sure I'm not asleep in this booth at Waffle House.
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
Congratulations, you have helped solved the mysterious disapperance of Dani's phone which was found in the munchies cabinet next to the oreos. Your reward is star power as well as a fat ass bowl of Nebula. You may proceed through the wardrobe and into Narnia for your prize.
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
Watch out for the bush at the end of your steps. it comes out of nowhere
I just got to my parents hungover as hell. My dad could tell and said "theres only one cure for a hangover" and handed me a beer. This morning went from a 0 to 10 in an instant.
Randomize
