I am going to be in the room whjen you have your first child and spit on its face before its even all the way out of you.
I feel like abortions should bother me more
Not only is chick snoring like a 48 year old man but she's farting in rhythm
Rule #1. Nothing comes between you and fantasy sports. Not even a hot chick willing to give you a blow job
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
God this is like a meg Ryan movie without the restaurant orgasms
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
Randomize
