My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
Just remembered I told my boss that matt used to make me toss his salad like every time we hooked up. Nice
Please stop sending me picture messages of your shit. Seriously. I don't care if it looks like popcorn chicken.
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
So me and him are making out, and the other two are on the couch behind us. he randomly stops kissing me and goes "oh god I think she just took off her shirt" I look behind me and I see her tits flapping up and down. This man has amazing senses..
I couldn't drown my sorrows in an ocean of jack daniels. They may have scuba gear.
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
In Texas. Drank way too much wine. Puked in a gallon zip lock bag. Passed out at 445 with the ENTIRE family here. Got up at 745 in time for dinner. I made you proud!!!
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
i just remember singing the theme song from 2 and 1/2 men to my hair
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