Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
So I'm seriously debating forwarding these sexts to his horse faced new gf including the ones that say he still loves me... but I still need his check to clear... decisions decisions
Oh my gosh they are following me around the bar
Blow your rape whistle
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
Beer coozy in the gym. Don't judge me.
after we were done she whispered to my dick "you sir, are a genius"
I guess all those years with her as your babysitter finally paid off.
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
Strip clubs it is bday boy. One condition. I am in full custody of your ID. I plan on being in no condition to coordinate rescue operations and we need to keep casualties to a minimum. You cannot be trusted.
Alright goddamnit. Can I bring my pirate hat?
I insist.
I brought a travel sized bottle of baby powder and sprinkled it on all of the couples making out on the wall in the basement
We need to stop smoking. I just ran into a glass door.
Randomize
