K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
this is ridiculous... i look like a white version of MC Hammer...
How does, "Im sorry I was such an intoxicated bitch, I didn't mean anything I said" sound as an apology.
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
I'm going to buy her a puppy, let her fall in love with it, then kill it in front of her. Does that answer how I feel about her?
Just so we're clear this time around: This is dinner with my FAMILY. Not an opportunity for you to drink too much, and use the word "dick-thumpin" in casual conversation.
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
What? My family got wasted on patron and I threw up on my pants and said it was gravy. Hot mess.
On a separate note, I just found out some condoms aren't vegan. Problem.
Hahahaha I can't wait for you to ask "wait. are there any animal by products in that?"
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
I left my panties in the microwave for too long and they caught on fire
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
I'm still, like... really stoked about not having any STDs
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
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