She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
You totally narrated your dogs thoughts for 2 and a half hours last night, and I was enthralled. I didn't say one word, I just listened.
My ferret is drunk. Someone told me you'd know what to do?
So i guess i slapped the girl sitting next to me leg and said "You know what they say, got fat legs...you gotta fat BOX"
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
they need to invent a card that reads "thanks for all those boners you gave me that you did NOTHING about"
My dad, when he got home and saw me loading a bowl in the living room: "We have TWO beautiful balconies to get high on and you pick the couch?!"
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
I'm eating tortillas right now. Like not cooked tortillas. Someone is playing the guitar. Man with bandana.
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
He sent me a dick pic from his living room and it has pictures of his three kids in the background
Can't beat it when the local bar sends you off with a loaf of bread on the way out the door.
Woke up next to a half eaten Philly Cheesesteak. Honestly probably one of the top 3 things I've ever woken up next to.
I just watched a squirrel take down a snake,life isn't so bad after all.
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
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