piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
As the guy I'm having sex with on the side I shouldn't ask you how to dump my boyfriend. But you are the most emotionally detached person I know.
Ideas for halloween. We need simple yet hilarious. Cheap yet effective. Slutty yet acceptable. Go.
why are all my papers due the day after my potential hangover
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
She literally took off her shirt and ran out of the bar. When she ran back she smashed into the glass door with her face....That's got to be the best way to celebrate your 30th.
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
You followed me up the stairs while i was throwing up yelling "projectile! projectile! projectile!"
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
If he’s halfway attractive, employed and cool with me having boytoys, I’ll marry him
Randomize
