He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
I might lose an organ but I've got booze. I'll be fine.
I'm on the struggle bus
just ordered a number 1 at a fast food restaurant that doesn't have numbers
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
No gay bar. My eyemake up looks like sex and Im using these dick daggers of mine tonight.
they adjusted my tv to black and white ... i thought i drank myself to colorblindness
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
Was expecting a sext from Kristi and then my mom randomly sent me a pic of her ugly Xmas sweater. Worst. Buzzkill. Ever.
he BROKE his KNEE while we were getting it on, called 911 and the ambulance that showed up contained two paramedics, ONE WAS HIS FUCKING SISTER!!! HOW IS THIS MY LIFE?!?!?!
Poor life choices...?
Knows all the good gay bars AND has a dog? Wtf can't I drop pizza on guys like that????
It's okay that we broke up and all but it's not okay that he still has my Chick-fil-A calendar card. This month is free fries!
Did you happen to find the other half of my bra last night?
Randomize