i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
Her vagina smelled like bad decisions
right as i was about to introduce them she goes "old fuck buddy, meet new fuck buddy."
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
Ugh. I guess I'm crying loudly or something. My mom just came in and gave me milk, chocolate, a Xanax, and her weed "for the break up blues". Her ways of affection are so odd.
What? My family got wasted on patron and I threw up on my pants and said it was gravy. Hot mess.
I just had to remind myself that I'm visible in real life. Sitting in the car in a parking lot, and almost took my shirt off because the tag is itchy and I wanted it off... and you know I don't wear bras...
Well then she has to know whoever you were kissing was in overalls because that's not a detail you just leave out.
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
You are currently doing Harry Potter spells with the turkey-baster...
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
Randomize
