Could a canary swim?
Last time I ever let you pet sit.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
He got mauled by a 200lb cement boulder and all he could say in the back of the ambulance is 'I'm so getting laid for this'
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
She called his dick the colossus. I dont give a fuck if shes his wingman, I gotta see this natural wonder
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere.
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
I'm serious-it was like trying to deep-throat a minivan.
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
Randomize