It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
If this herpes test comes back negative I'm asking out the doctor.
Dude's from Puerto Rico. Majoring in Spanish is like us majoring in drinking with a minor in watching Forgetting Sarah Marshall.
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
that wasn't rum that I poured down your throat while you were sleeping
I'm gonna make a therapist very happy and very wealthy this semester.
I really just want to eat 20 mcnuggets and slap everyone with the box when I'm done.
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
Oh. My. God. I. Am. Going. To. Punch. Someone. In. The. Face. Immediately.
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
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