would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
I smoked weed with pregnant girl. I'm going to hell.
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
Uggh answer your phone, you are the only one I know who'll be proud of what I woke up next to this morning .
I want someone to sweep me off my feet and you want someone to fuck you on the kitchen table. They're both perfectly logical needs.
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
also dude totally apologize for the whole drunken "want something in my mouth" text
We had him convinced Visine is flammable. He was genuinely freaked out that everyone would know when he was stoned.
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
I LACK THE NECESSARY BRAIN FUNCTIONS TO BE ABLE TO PROPERLY RESPOND TO THAT
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
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