and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
Sacagawea was the original milf.
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
please dont tell anyone i was drunk
you were publicly making out with a very old very spandex covered woman...they know
I made popcorn. Partly so the room doesn't smell like sex, and partly to apologize for the things you saw when you walked in...
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
and then you looked me right in the eyes and said "i just really wanna pet some horses right now"
He shoved his balls through an egg carton and showed us a picture. They were surprisingly egg-like.
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
I messaged him asking for his address. He replied with the address then said, "If you're gonna stalk me, I'm the third window on the side and usually get naked around 8am and anytime randomly after 6pm (listen for music).. If you're sending anthrax, I'm 6'2" 225lbs so send a good amount."
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
My favorite thing about your netflix account "suggestions for you" section: Russias Toughest Prisons is followed immediately by Strange Sex
I held the blackjack dealer's hand and told the old asian woman she was 'soft to the touch, but cold as ice"
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
Randomize
