you really are a gigantic fucking slut.
sidenote: just remembered sarcasm does not translate through text
it's probably a bad thing that i wasn't even offended, huh?
my facebook is like a giant collection of my one night stands
I just woke up with a bunch of French fries in my hand and a chocolate shake balancing on my pillow. Lovely.
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
it's not like this is the first time she's brought a guy home and I'm the one who hooks up with him
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
I'm touching everything in your apartment with my penis.
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
my roommates are pretty pissed at me. they sent me out for ice and i came back with a kitten.
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