ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
Sorry I thought I was a lizard earlier.
I haven't gotten laid in forever. I'm obsessed. I imagine I this is how Ethopians feel about food.
Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
I've carried my liver for over 24 years. If it can't carry me for the next 24 hours than it deserves to be damaged.
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
Rumor has it that you want to bring me soup in exchange for a blow job.
It's my birthday, dammit, and I'm getting something for free. I don't care if it's just a drink at the bar.
YOU CAN GET THIS DICK FOR FREE
Weight watchers just said "you've tracked beer three times recently, want to make it one of your favorites?" I'm begining to understand why I needed to go in the first place.
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
Randomize