shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
I told him I'd have sex with him for fried cheese. Does that make me a hooker or just fat?
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
I'm walking home wearing Kermit the frog footie pajamas, carrying a monogrammed shot glass set with my name on it. It's fucking Christmas!
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
I'm drunk in a field. the chupacobra is going to eat me. if I die serve vodka at my funeral.
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
Friendly reminder that on the walk home you tripped but instead of falling to the sidewalk, you tried to save it and ended up headbutting my ex-boyfriend in the balls. ILU.
Don't tell him that you hope he dies in a boring missionary position with his wife. That doesn't go over well.
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
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