i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
I can't cum and do my makeup at the same time.
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
so im sitting outside the gym eating a 20 piece nugget stoned out of my mind, convincing myself this is more productive because im so close to the treadmills.
I'be color coordinated the clothes in my closet and my underwear drawer. I'm like an advertisement for house arrest. Help.
I woke up this morning to a lot of blurry photos of a swan i must have chased down the riverbank and a handbag full of loose haribo.
I just picked up my phone and one shoe from the man mowing the lawn next to the ice rink. He found them in a tree.
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
there is a smiley face on my leg painted in blood
I'm pretty sure that's yours.
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
I woke up this morning cradling my vibrator like it was a baby
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
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