I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
I've never seen anyone write a check for a bar tab before
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
It was the third Sunday in a row that I woke up in his bathtub. So no our sex life isn't that great anymore.
She said "don't make this weird" and then proceeded to sniff me.
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
Being invited to eat tater tots at 1:30am by a rly hot girl then actually only eating tater tots is a major let down. Tasty, but still a let down
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
He carried around a bottle of jäger the whole night and when everyone thought the cops came, he started doing push ups in the middle of the floor cause he said it calmed him down.
I just formed the "shit on a tree in Chicago club." And I feel awful about it.
I got horny for like a second but the eggplant snapped me out of it
I sent him a blank text because I didn't want to "drunk text" him.
I mean his penis was perfect in pictures but its even more perfect inside me
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