i asked him to tell me something nice and he said "your vagina is really tight."
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
No one would take shots with Caroline so she asked the bartender for like 20 jagerbombs and then shouted "JAGERBOMBS FOR HOMELESS ANIMALS BENEFIT" and everyone started doing them with her
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
I tried sex in a car once. It was like trying to do yoga in a drainage pipe with your arms and legs tied while using a typewriter with your penis.
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
It's 7am. I'm making pizza & watching the Matrix. I will not be bothered.
To answer your next question, yes, I'm drunk.
It's not christmas until we're acting sober in front of grandma
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
Randomize
