That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
I only knew it was midnight because i got happy new years texts while i puked outside
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
Every time you come over you bleed on everything. I'm not calling Verizon again asking if blood is considered water damage.
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
I cried singing "call me maybe" on the way home from the bar. What the fuck
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
you got in a fight with your imaginary friend last night when he didn't catch you after a surprise trust fall
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
I'm just to the point my give a fucks is so far in the red that I'm going to have to take out a 30yr loan of fucks to repay it
It doesn't count as "finding the lesbian" if you fuck a straight girl!
I woke up with my winter coat on, next to a polaroid of me, her and a swan...so no I don't remember our conversation.
Randomize