My history with restaurant waiters is severely limiting our dinner options.
you kept lifting my skirt up, yelling "PANTY PARTY". needless to say, you're at the top of my father's shit list right now.
i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
Actions speak louder than pants.
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
did you know that if you have sex in the elevator on the way up that people can still get in?
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
Apparently fireball doesn't mix well with my no carb diet
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
This is like the first time all week I've properly taken my birth control. My ovaries are so stoked I just know it.
Randomize
