Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
Now that Steinbrenner is in heaven he's going to make Jesus cut his hair
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
i do some of my deepest thinking on my wednesday morning walks of shame
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
I found your Halloween costume. I think you shit yourself last night
I will give you the couch, a small portion of the fridge, and plenty of beer.
Got my future figured out. I'm oddly comforted. Thanks, bro.
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
Randomize
