Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
I puked last after eating a volcano taco and drinking vodka. I felt like a fucking dragon.
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
the bouncer made me realize that puking in line does not get you in any faster
How's your Sunday morning ritual of shitting and throwing up at the same time going?
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
So if I get kidnapped from my office and go missing for a few days does that count against my vacation days and do I still get paid?
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
I'm about to order this penis-casting kit so text me within 5 mins if you're not down
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
Randomize
