OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
You really need to take down the pics of you and your boyfriend on facebook. It's becoming increasingly harder to jerk off while i'm Facebook stalking your pics at 2am.
His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
im at work. we just had a random 14-year-old amish girl come in and gift us with cinnamon rolls as thanks for letting her use the bathroom. i dont even know.
Mike showed up naked and in handcuffs. Again. Feel free to come over and laugh because I'm not helping this time.
Literally had to stick my hands in my pants and hold my butt cheeks together while driving
like i literally can feel my uterus getting frustrated at me for not being pregnant.
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
Also I just took the BEST ass selfie of my adult life.... it's gonna be a good day haha
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
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