Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
Freshman orientation day on campus. Dear diary, JACKPOT.
96 perecent sure i just took a shower with socks
i just snorted my name. best moment ever
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
Nothing is working I'm going to die alone and on hold with a State Farm representative
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
Randomize
