i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
We were hooking up, both of us naked. She starts putting her clothes back on and says, "I have to go to the bathroom." I reply, "No you don't, you're leaving." Without hesitation she looks at me and says, "Yeah."
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
I blacked out after the shots of canned lobster bisque.
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
no, i remember trying to staple my nipples together. I just can't figure out where the hell stapler came from.
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
Okay, yeah, judgmental guy at 7/11. I'm buying g wine at 10:20 in the morning. You wanna fight about it?
In a few weeks I'll be a beautiful butterfly and me and my cat will have to repopulate the earth. WE WILL REBUILD!!
So, 'head before the store' turned into a fuck fest, & that's how I ended up at the grocery store smelling like a cum farm on Black Friday. How's your weekend?
Randomize
