no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
He offered to take me out to a nice dinner but I told him I would rather he just pay for my beer this weekend
The only thing the cop asked me is..... "how are you still alive"?
Then he complimented me on how excellent I was at breathing through my nose
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
The bartender has no bra and is giving out free shots. Call mom I'm getting married.
I just plagiarized Dr. Curtis Connor's ideology from Spider-man in an essay on genetically engineered embryos. College: academic integrity at its finest.
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
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